Having a Picture of Burnt Toast In Your Wallet.

The Unnecessary Shake.

Party Hats + Faded.

The Dumbledore Clap.

Skoo Ba Doo Ba Doo Bop.

Small Purchase Receipt For Tax Purposes.

Having a McDonald’s In Your Mansion and Paying Your Employees Well.

Pizza Slap.

Knife In a Burger?

“Tattoo That On My Chest.”

Bummin’ Two Smokes and Tuckin’ One Behind the Left Ear.

Golfing With a Mask On Post Pandemic.

Overdoing Last Dance References.

The Albert Belle.

Touching the “Extremely Hot” Plate.

Personifying Inanimate Objects To Crush Some Rap Bars. 

The Fray.


Hyping Up Your BF After Every Accomplishment on MLB The Show.

Sour Patch Kids Backpack.

Rockin’ a Jordan #12 Jersey.

Spelling Your Last Name Wrong.

Ty Segall On the Jukebox.

Shower Ice Water. 

Carol Baskin’s Voice.

Send Songs That are Insanely Popular to Friends on Spotify .

Send a Sappy Accidental Personal Text to Someone in a Group Chat.

8 Strips of Bacon.

Hooking Your Portable Speaker Up to Unnecessary Shit.

Sour Patch Kids in the Fridge.

Ice Water.

Just Straight Up Buying Golden Tee.

Acting Like Your Camera is Frozen During a Google Hangout.

Never Missing a Bless You.
Buying Those Weird Infomercial Coins.

Leading Someone to the Wrong Apartment.

Tweeting Random Lyrics.

Singing The Background Vocals.


“Drinkin’ a Bud.” When You’re Clearly Not Drinking a Budweiser.

Spare the Super Annoying Food Stuck in Your Teeth.

Dry Swallowing Advil.

Spill a Little Water on Yourself and Don’t Mention It.

DM Your Not So Close Friends Instagram Ads.

Calling Songs Pieces.

…………………………….. GGGOOOAAAATTT!.

Sharing Your Nashville Hot Chicken Recipe.

Getting a Pet Tiger/Cheetah/Camel and Bringing it to Brunch.

Calling CBS CVS and CVS CBS.

The Olives Have Pits In Them.

Pay Bobby Dolan Pt. 3.

Pay Bobby Dolan a Dollar.

Venmoing People With Your Name.

Covering Someone’s Eyes and Screaming While They Drive.

Clicking Cute Shit on Amazon So Your Facebook Ads are Full of Cute Shit.

Adding “Penis” to Songs.

Bringing Bread to Quiznos and See If They’ll Toast It..

Creating A Weird Voice/Character In Someone’s Head.

Groping Dudes at Work.

Finishing Your Drink and Handing It Off.

Watching “The Game” at a Winery.


“Go Drink Your Diet Coke For Breakfast”.

Planting Magnums.

The Linkedin Hack.

Only Shots.

Be The Guy Everyone Secretly Hates.

The Idea of Surfing.

Create An Awkward Situation Through Networking.


Calling Out Haters When You Clearly Have No Haters.

Over-The-Top Ray Rice Statuses.

Hit Your Girlfriend With an Extremely Advanced Sports Question.

Give Directions In Political Terms.

Using Awful Metaphors To Describe How Heavy Something Is.

Getting Mad Over The Color Shirt Someone Is Wearing.

Wearing Man Thongs.

Go Bush-League on Bathroom Etiquette.

Autographing Random Things at Work.

Assume a Random Dude Is On Your Side In a Fake Fight.

Order a Big Mac at Starbucks.

Creating Fictional Band T-Shirts.

Texting/Tweeting In “SportsCenter Sidebar”.

Not Seeing a Popular Chick Flick So You Can Run the “Oh I Haven’t Seen That Movie We Should See It Some Time” Game.

Fake Gift For Co-Worker.

Going to Random Hotels to Get Free Continental Breakfast.

How to Attack a Stupid Status.

Band T-Shirts On Bebs.

Dressing Up Your Lamp.


Telling Chicks You’re Engaged When You’re Not.

Calling Someone a “Snooze Button”.

Getting Fat As Shit.

Farting With a Purpose.

Making A Shirt To Promote How Much Your Friend Sucks.

Wasuh Doo!?!?!?.

Saying “Job Opening” When a Waiter Drops a Plate.

Fake Stories.

Referencing Numbers To Athletes.

Downgrading Your Athleticism in Pre-Game Warm-Ups.

Mimic Everything Manti Te’o Did.

Being Radically Real.

Wearing An Awesome T-Shirt + Blazer.

Creating Your Own Hip-Hop Verse.

Calling Budweisers Rustics.

The Nice Bathroom Experience.

Slammin 5-Hour Energies.

Shotgunning Only Half Of Your Beer (Then Tossing It).

Random Catch Phrases Between Your Friends.

Buffalo Wild Wings Blazin’ Challenge.

Water Shots.

Knowing The Unpopular Songs Of One Hit Wonders.

The Craigslist Fake Traveler.

Asking For Obscure Exotic Drinks.

Accusing Someone Of Fake Stealing.

The Stranger.

Getting Overly Jacked Up When Your Friend Succeeds.

Comparing Someone’s Name To Someone Else’s Name.

Forcing Someone To Be The Designated Driver.

Sending A Fake Wrong Text Message.

Acting As A College Coach At High School Football Games.

Loving Glamorous By Fergie.

Taking A Friendly Greeting Literally.

Insulting Every Detail About Someone’s Meal.

Bringing An Excess Of Alcohol To Social Functions.

Over Apologizing For A Minor Fault.

Changing Your Sneeze Everytime.

Get A Free Lunch From Your Buddy.

Never First Bump Anyone Ever Again.

The Ole Coffee Mug Salute.

Tossing Your Beer Cap.

Buying Domain Names.