I’m getting sick of the guy that walks by you and asks, “how ya doing, bud”? Listen, pal, I know you don’t give shit how I’m actually “doing”. Can’t you just give me the well-respected manly head nod hello and keep moving? I’ll be honest with all of you out there; I’ve been feeling a bit stagnant lately with my moves, so I thought this is the perfect time to bring a new one into my life. My new move is to call these guys on their bullshit and really tell them how I’m “doing”, and it’s going to get really negative. Please, observe this. “Hey, bud, how ya doing”? Big mistake, my friend, let me tell you! “Oh, man, not too good. I’m like three months behind on my car payment. The bills are just piling up. Plus, I just talked to my mom, and my dad’s hitting the bottle pretty hard again. I’m just down, man, ya know? But hey, I’m glad I ran into you. Do you think you have some time to sit down real quick and talk? I could really use a friend”. Let me be the first to tell you that this guy does NOT have time to talk with you. Well, he may, but he won’t tell you that. How do I know? I used this line yesterday on some big goof at work that always calls me “bud”. You want to know his response? “Oh, sorry, man. I wish I had time, but I’m late for a meeting”. Whether he really is late for a meeting or just simply doesn’t give a shit; crisis averted! I have yet to see this guy around work since the move, but I guarantee when I do he’ll either give me the head nod or avoid me at all costs. Either way it’s a huge win for me. Give this a shot if you hate people like this too. COULD BE THE MOVE!

– JB